It’s official. You heard it here first.  A new classification of hill grade has been identified and it’s the Bastard Grade.

Today’s cycle started out well enough – we would have about 54km to do in about 5 hours.  This sounded easy peasy! We would be on the beach in no time, possibly with caipirinhas in hand congratulating ourselves on a good day’s cycle.  Yes, well, one can dream. 


Suddenly this moderate cycle along the coast from São Paulo to Rio became a little like what I imagine cycling the Alpine stages of the Tour de France to be. Bloody hard hills.  The first Bastard Hill was a mere 400m climb in 3km, and even the thought of this made my legs turn to jelly.

The hills along the coast to Rio do kind of take you by surprise. Many are long and gradual (nice and acceptable) which turn into utter Bastard Grades without warning – especially on the tight bends. 

I have to admit that my little legs just weren’t up to it, and I pushed my bike up at least a quarter of the total hill climbs.  The ‘Cycle the Coast to Rio’ title of the trip is fast becoming ‘Cycle-slash-Walk the Coast to Rio’

I’m in good company though, most of us had to walk at some point, with only the amazing Carol and Richard making it without having to do a little bit of pushing. 

To put the day into perspective, we cycled 35 miles (56km) in 4.15 hours, gaining height of 1211 meters and descending 1184 meters. That’s higher than Snowdon and just 130m short of Ben Nevis.  Knowing I’ve basically cycled up a mountain doesn’t help. It was still flipping hard!

Our end point tonight is Ilha Bela, a short ferry ride from Sao Sebastianos. Having offered us the ‘opportunity’ for an additional cycle to see some of the island once we reached camp before we left this morning, this was wisely not mentioned again. Our group leaders are doing an amazing job of gauging the mood and adapting accordingly, thus avoiding murder or mutiny. 

After such a day, there would be nothing better than a G&T, a piping hot shower and a massive comfy bed in which to dream of cycling along the flat coast to Rio, and finishing under the balloon arch in Brazillian colours that we are expecting.  How lucky we are to be camping tonight of all nights and although we were blowing up camping mats and unrolling sleeping bags instead of diving into a massive comfy bed, we were still dreaming of balloon arches.

The hardest two days are now over.

Highlights: Amazing exhilarating descents, seeing ants carrying ridiculously big leaves by the side of the road because we were walking, chain staying on, being greeted by a huge macaw at the camp site, not having to put up your own tent, citronella candles thoughtfully packed by Jackie, my self inflating camping mat actually turning out to be comfortable.

Lowlights: Bastard Grade hills, giving myself a deep and oily cut on the leg by ramming the gear sprocket things into my ankle as I tried to lower the bike to the floor, Bastard Grade hills, throwing up on return to camp and feeling like death, Bastard Grade hills, walking to Rio, and did I mention the hills?